“There is Help! There is Hope!” By Marion Bono

There is Help! There Is Hope!

It is important to help our mentally ill family member to become as independent as possible: have an apartment, job, transportation, income. If they know they are loved, they are more likely to venture out to become independent.

When our mentally ill loved one needs guidance, it is powerful to act out of love. Having a solid foundation based on love is key. So many parents are not comfortable saying the words, “I love you” for a variety of reasons. For instance, they may have been raised in a home where parents were not comfortable saying these words. It might make them feel too vulnerable. They feel love, but they are not comfortable saying it. Whatever the reason, it is never too late to learn to say, “I love you.” Practice, “I love you.” “I love you.”

If things have been strained because of inappropriate or hurtful things your family member has done, make the distinction between your family member and what he has done. How much of this is your family member, and how much of this is the illness? We make the distinction by explaining, “I don’t like what you did, but I love you.”

Look for opportunities to say complimentary things to your family member. For instance:

“It makes me happy when I come home and you have cleaned your room.” “I really appreciate that you came in the kitchen to help me fix dinner.”
“ I like your hair fixed that way.”
“I enjoyed watching that movie with you last night.”

If your family member is an adult and can live alone, you might consider alternative living arrangements. In Lake Charles there are two low-rent, subsidized apartment complexes that are strictly for people with a diagnosis of a mental illness. They can be active during the day and sleep safely at night. There are also Section 8 apartments, handled by the Lake Charles Housing Authority. Be sure to mention that the person has a mental illness because they set aside certificates for people with disabilities. Living away from home is a big step towards independence. And remember, “Absence makes the heart grow fonder.”

Having a job is another major step towards independence. If your family member was already a member of the work world, this can simplify matters. Often they can simply return to their former job. In treatment, they may have learned how to ask for accommodations on the job if they are needed. If they have never worked, they may wonder what job – how do I get a job? Louisiana Rehabilitation Program will test for aptitude, find training, find a job, and even send a job coach, if necessary.

Goodwill WorkPlace Training and Assistance Center offers career services, life skills classes, computer classes, veteran services. They provide career exploration, resume assistance, interview preparation, employment applications, image and presentation, job retention, and professional communication. In addition, they offer financial literacy, stress relief, relationship building, conflict resolution, tech skills for daily living – just to name a few.

A person with a job needs transportation to and from the job. Louisiana Transit provides this transportation.

Even if a person is working, it is still a good idea to apply for SSI (for someone who has never worked) or SSDI (for someone who has worked.) There are attorneys who specialize in applying for Social Security benefits.

Though you are only allowed a certain income when you are working and on Social Security, there is a program called Ticket to Work which allows a person on disability to make a certain amount of income. This program provides an incentive to get off disability.

There is so much help available for people with mental illness. It is important to know about calling 211 to find out this information. Call, ask your question and you will be given a phone number to call. For instance, what are the phone numbers for the apartments for people with mental illness? What is the phone number for Louisiana Rehabilitation? Where can my mentally ill family member receive job training? What is the phone number for Louisiana Transit?

So much HELP! So much HOPE!